Many Lessons Learned in Malawi

The Garden

Pinky and I had started a garden in January at the House of Peace Rescue Unit. It is of a good size and contains okra, mustard greens, cabbage, chinese cabbage, eggplant, tomatoes, Irish potatoes, carrots, and beans (the cooking kind, not the vegetable). We call it the ‘experimental’ garden because we’re using the garden to teach the kids different things about growing crops. We’re teaching them how to plant and grow different types of crops, what grows in their area, and the best way of cultivating the crops to have a better harvest. We also planted both the fruit and the seed of many vegetables to see what they can grow without having seeds. For example, we planted tomato seeds from a package and from an actual tomato so they can see which one grows better. We also built a box to put a variety of the vegetables in to see the difference when you keep crops off the ground and away from the bugs. They have really been enjoying working in the garden. Nothing has sprouted yet, but when it does it will be used as food to feed the kids. Lord willing, some of the things will also be sent home with the kids for them to plant at their own home.

Encouragement

I’ve decided that I need to become more of an encourager to people, whether that’s to my coworker, Pinky, the facilitators and staff here in Malawi, the Malawi BMW students, or people back home. Encouragement is something that I need to exercise in my life and thus shine Christ’s love through my actions. Why should my job of encouraging wait to start when I arrive in Florida? I might as well start now. One way that I’m trying to be an encourager is by giving the students something special every Tuesday. On my first Tuesday back at the base, I made them all cinnamon tortillas in the shape of stars and gave them juice at lunch. As each one received the treat, I said thank you to them and I told them they were doing a good job in their work. I’ve also been sharing different food items with the staff members and I’ve even been sharing many things with Pinky. Generosity and encouragement go hand in hand, and God is teaching me to use this avenue to reach out more. I want the people around me to learn and grow.

Trusting in the Lord

I’ve been beginning to look ahead to preparing for deputation when I get home. I know things are going to be chaotic when I get back and I don’t want to be a burden to my supporters by giving them short notice. But as I started writing things down I realized just how much I have to do! But God reminded me that He is in control and He is the One who wants me on staff and He will guide and direct me. I do know that whatever happens, God has a big plan and He will work things out to accomplish that plan.

Time

Past, present, and future: people can live in the past, they can live in the future, or they can live in the present. I’ve struggled with living in the past this month as I’ve looked back on many mistakes that I’ve made and I was having trouble to not dwell on it. I also was living in the future by planning too much about when I get on staff. But I realized that living in the past and living in the future does no good for my ministry now. Yes, I should learn from the past and yes I should plan for the future, but I should live in the present. And that is something I am now consciously working on. I am learning to focus on the present; to focus on the now.

Route 81

On Feb 10, Pinky and I went to the Base for Refresher and the chapel of Mr. Bland impacted me. He had entitled it ‘Route 81’; basically, it’s some things he’s learned along the route of his life thus far. These things really gave me something to think about and I enjoyed the chapel very much. These are the main things I took away from his message: 1) Put God first (Col 1:8). 2) Don’t be surprised when afflictions come; God will deliver us out of them all. 3) Get victory over money. 4) You will never be lifted above your prayer life. 5) If you want the will of God, you have to press in to it – you have to take a step of faith and get started, then God will steer you; don’t be afraid to step out in faith; as soon as you do step out, satan will oppose you. 6) Get someplace and stay there, have deep roots in the ministry, and don’t quit. 7) Learn who your biggest enemy is – yourself! Be thankful! (1 Cor 3:15) We are here to give, not to get. 9) Keep your eye on the goal. 10) 1 Cor 15:58 – “Therefore my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your labor is not in vain in the Lord.”

Thank you for sharing your wisdom Mr. Bland!

Teacher Training

After refresher, we returned to House of Peace and I began a series of classes known as ‘teacher training.’ I taught the older students that came to the unit and I was teaching them how to be teachers. We focused on things like the 3 types of learners, the importance of involving Christ in your teaching, and other things along those lines. One of the classes I taught was on music and teaching them the importance and purpose of worship. We read in 2 Samuel 6 about how David danced before the Lord with all his might and how He told his wife he would become even more undignified than that! We all were encouraged by David’s zest for God, and even after that class I went and had one of the most powerful prayer times I’ve had in a while.

7 Deadly Sins

The 7 deadly sins sound so awful, and yet can easily slip by unnoticed. Hence the term ‘deadly.’ I found myself guilty of gluttony. It’s not a frequent thing, but when going in to town or invited to someone’s house for dinner, I would eat more than enough and then feel very full. Not a big deal. Except, it is a sin. No matter how small I may think my occasional gluttony is, it’s still wrong and it’s still a sin. Even though I really do enjoy those hamburgers in town . . . and Heni’s cooking is so good . . . I need to get a handle on this area of my life and I have been doing much better. Another ‘small’ sin that I realized I had fallen into was stealing. Not stealing like money or ‘big things’, but maybe having a bite of Pinky’s peanut butter or a drink of her juice without asking first. It sounds so trivial and childish, but I’ve really been convicted of it. It’s not mine, and unless I have permission from her, I should not be eating, taking, or using her things. Stealing is stealing, whether it’s a drink of Pinky’s juice or robbing a bank. Sin is sin.

Running to Christ

I’ve been struggling with having desires for a relationship, and I know that is not what God has for me and that He wants me to focus on Him. But this month I kept finding my mind drifting back to people at home and thoughts like: what if I was dating this person, what if I had never ended the relationship with this person . . . thoughts that were not beneficial to anyone. I realized I needed to get my mind in check and “flee the evil desires of youth.” I realized that one of the ways to avoid this was something I mentioned before: live in the present and not the past. Don’t look back on past relationships and desire them again. And don’t focus on the future desiring a family. Focus on God; remember my relationship with Christ, that I am my Beloved’s and He is mine. His desire is towards me. Jesus Christ is the One I love and I will remain faithful to Him and Him alone.

Feeding Time

Pinky and I decided to feed a family again. There is a boy names Suti who comes to the unit everyday with his brother Lishitwe and his sister Rudy. They’re typically the first kids there and the last to leave. And they’re great kids. Well, we had the family over (Suti, Lishitwe, Rudy, another brother, and the mother) and we fed them rice, soya, pumpkin greens, spaghetti, and hot chocolate. We ate out under the stars and it was such a wonderful evening of sharing with them. They were all stuffed by the time they were done. And we sent the leftovers home with them.

Building Benches

The adult team that came in January had built benches for the different units. We received a delivery of benches at House of Peace and we finished them by nailing on attachments between the table and benches. The kids were very excited to have a sturdy place during classes and it was neat for me to work on the benches because they were the same benches that my brother had worked on when the team was here. So it was a nice reminder to me to finish something my brother started.

Mammon

Along with learning to be an encourager, God has also been teaching me to be more generous. I’ve always tried to be smart with money, but I’ve been on the line of stinginess. But I’m learning to open up and be more generous. I’m sharing more of my things and even my food, and I’m using my money to get things for the kids or for sharing purposes. And I’m learning not to grudgingly give or share things with Pinky – this is probably the biggest area of generosity that I’ve been battling. But God is helping me overcome this. After all, material possessions and money aren’t lasting; people are.

In the Word

This month, I’ve been in the Word more than usual and I’ve really been enjoying it. I reviewed a study I had done in December on the word ‘immediately’ as found in the book of Mark. I revisited how diligent Christ was in doing the work of the Father and I reminded myself that I need to have this diligence as well.

I also did a study of the word ‘Selah’ in Psalms. Selah is the pause that refreshes, so I went through Psalms to see what gave reasons to pause and be refreshed. I was actually surprised to find that not all ‘Selah’s’ followed verses on the character of God. Rather, there were many verses that are David talking about all of the distress he was going through and how he had been forgotten and rejected and downcast – Selah – but God is still faithful. It was a neat reminder that no matter what I am facing, I can paused and be refreshed knowing that God is who He says He is.

Another one of my studies was done on the topic ‘God’s Word in today’s music.’ God has always used music to reach and touch and encourage me, and I always loved when I came across a verse in Scripture that I recalled as a line in a Christian song. So I went through and found those verses and wrote them down. I guess it wasn’t as much as a bible study, but it sure was an encouragement.

Through all of this, I have still been continuing on my study of John 16:33. I started at Genesis 1:1 and I’m going through the entire Bible looking at how we have peace in God, how we are promised tribulation in life, and how Christ has overcome the world. I’m in the middle of Mark right now and I’m learning so much. This is the first time I’ve ever read the Bible cover to cover in one go. In fact, this year has even been the first time that I’ve actually had consistent daily devotions of my own initiative instead of doing it because it was scheduled for me. I’ve been missing out all of these years! But I will never again pass on the opportunity to spend time in God’s word every day.

85 Tambala a Day

On February 20, it was nearing dusk and I was fanning the fire in the kitchen so I could cook. I heard Pinky call for me and I told her I’d be right there. But she told me to come – now. So I went over to her and realized what the fuss was about. There was a boy on the ground having what looked like a seizure. He came out of it moments after I arrived. Now for background, when I was a young child my dad had a brain hemorrhage and he almost lost his life. Afterwards, it was a long recovery process and seizures were a normal occurrence for years. I started asking this boy all the questions I remembered seeing the EMS squad asking my dad. What is your name, how old are you, where do you live? (Yay basic Chichewa skills!). I didn’t know how to ask who the current president was . . . The boy’s name was Sengwa and he was 15 and he pointed in the direction where he lived. I didn’t recognize him because he didn’t frequently come to the unit. Pinky and I figured it was best to get Uncle Gift to talk with him more and to try to figure out what caused the seizure. Pinky was there when it happened and she said the boy was standing up playing football one minute and then he just fell straight over and went into the seizure.

We sent one of the kids to the field for Uncle and told him to hurry while we kept an eye on Sengwa. The kid came back and said Uncle was coming. Some time passed and we sent the kid again. Uncle still didn’t come. We sent the kid a third time and when he returned without Uncle, I went down to the field myself and told him we were having a medical emergency and needed him up at the unit NOW. He slowly started up the field and I began to explain to him what happened. When I mentioned who it was, he said, ‘Oh Sengwa? It’s okay. This happens at least 6 times a day.” I asked him how long it has been happening and from what he knows, it’s been like that all of Sengwa’s life.

When we got to the unit, Uncle had Sengwa show us the scar from a knife wound in his stomach from where he had gone into a fit while cutting something and he fell on the knife (Over the next few days, I also noticed that he has a large scar on his shoulder, but I don’t know what it is from, and he also holds his right arm at an awkward angle and I think there is something wrong with it). I asked Uncle if his parents had taken him to the hospital and Uncle said they had and they said Sengwa had epilepsy. I asked if they had medication for him, but Uncle said the family didn’t buy it because it was too expensive. I made the point that he could end up with brain damage if this goes untreated. But he replied by saying that he already had brain damage so there was no point of having the medicine. “Besides, he can still work in the field.” Yeah, until he falls on the hoe and injures himself again . . .Trying to control my rising anger, I asked if he realized that if it continues to go untreated that the brain damage will get even worse to the point that he cannot even function. Uncle didn’t’ respond. We made sure Sengwa made it home safely that night.

Sengwa actually came back the next day. Why? Because he realized someone cared about him. I love Malawians, but one of my biggest problems is their treatment of people who are ‘different’ within their own culture. If someone has a deformity or disability, they’re tossed aside as useless and they just stick them out in a field to try to get work out of them. They don’t bother to send these kids to school or sometimes to even teach them. It’s so sad. There is a girl at Peace named Becka and she’s partially deaf and the other kids (and even adults) treat her like she’s stupid. But she’s not stupid; she just has trouble hearing. Believe in her and she can do great things. It’s the same with Sengwa: he’s a burden because he falls over during football or he slows the other kids down because he’s having a seizure. No one believes in him. Yes, he has gotten some brain damage over the years, but he’s not stupid. He still understands things, he still has feelings, he still has dreams. He needs someone to believe in him.

That Monday, Pinky and I went into Lilongwe to find the medication for Sengwa and find out how much it was to see if we would be able to buy it for him. The medicine is Phenobarbital and he would need one pill a day for the rest of his life. For a bottle of 1000 pills it is k850. That means it is only 85 tambala a day to keep Sengwa from having seizures and to allow him to live a normal life. With an exchange rate of 170 Kwatcha per USD, one pill costs $0.005 – half of a penny a day. So for a year of medication for Sengwa, it would be $1.825 for a year of medication. So, with the Malawian life expectancy rate being around 40, it would be around $73 to medicate him for his entire life. But he’s already 15, so it would only be $45.625 to medicate him for the rest of him life so that he will stop falling on the ground and having seizures 6 times a day. So why do his parents not get him the medicine? Honestly, I don’t think it’s lack of money as much as it is ignorance: They don’t fully understand that he can get worse so they don’t see the point of spending money on medicine. Pinky and I are doing what we can to supply the medicine for Sengwa.

Pinky and I left House of Peace permanently to work at other units. When the truck came to pick us up on February 24, Sengwa was there. We loaded the truck with our belongings and furniture, but just as we were covering the things with a tarp, it began to rain. Within 5 minutes the road was a muddy mess and the truck got stuck. We spent three hours trying to get it out of the mud using branches, rocks, grass, and manpower. It was mostly the men of the village helping to get the truck out while the kids watched. However, Sengwa was helping where he could. Every time the truck advanced, he used his shirt to hold rocks as he gathered them from where the truck had been and them carried them to the new rut in the road. His shirt was already torn, without a sleeve, and hanging by half of the neckline. Carrying heavy rocks in it just tore it more. I kept looking over and smiling at him, and he just grinned ear to ear every time he saw me smile at him. He was being so helpful. During this time of getting the truck out, he sat himself down and then went into another fit – poor kid . . . We finally got the truck past the muddy part of the road and we said our good byes to the kids. I pulled Sengwa aside and told him thank you, encouraged him, and told him Christ loves him and so do I. Then I took my shirt off (don’t worry, I was dressed in layers) and I gave it to him as a gift and as a thank you for helping us to get the truck out. We drove away and I saw him in the rearview mirror, grinning and with a clean shirt on his shoulders. I don’t think I’ll ever forget Sengwa.

Think First

We arrived at the base that night and moved into the Bland’s apartment (thank you so much Mr. Bland! It’s wonderful and such a treat – we really appreciate your generosity). After unpacking by candlelight (the transformer had been struck by lightning early February and we’ve been without power or running water since then – we were used to these conditions anyway from living in the village so it wasn’t too big of a deal), we went over to Mat and Heni Wylie’s for dinner and a meeting about our new ministry and other things like that. I had to humble myself to confront them about something that I had been struggling with. I realized over the last few weeks of February that I have a big problem with saying ‘no’ to people and that my willingness to help out is not always paralleled with prayer and seeking God for direction. They had asked me to stay in Malawi until right before the summer teams, and without even thinking about it, I said yes because I wanted to help out. My impulsiveness always seems to get me in trouble: I later realized that it was not a good idea to stay that late and that it would be better to return in late May in order to take care of some things and my own health before venturing out on another team. So I had to humbly go before them and explain (well knowing that some level of disappointment would follow) and ask to go back with Pinky and Adam. I’ve always had a problem with speaking or acting without thinking first, and it has gotten me in a lot of trouble. But God’s working on it with me. He’s also teaching me to seek His will before making a big decision, and He’s even been guiding me in the very small stuff. It’s almost bizarre to see all of the little things that God keeps guiding me in – making comments or holding my tongue in conversation, using the right words and phrasing in letters, and even when to do certain things. I don’t think I’ve ever felt His guidance so directly in these areas of my life. I like it. And it’s teaching me to really listen to God’s guidance and not to disregard it.

Conclusion

I thank you all for your prayers as I continue in this ministry. I really feel that even though I’ve come over here to serve others and allow God to use me to minister to them, the biggest work God has been doing is in my own life. He’s training and teaching me in so many areas, and though the training is not always easy, I’ve thankful for it and I will praise the Lord.

Serving God,

Allie Kozlowski

Isaiah 6:8 / John 16:33